


Unfortunate Happenings

by sadtimesbabey



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, BAMF Spencer Reid, Bisexual Spencer Reid, Derek is kinda mean, Dissociation, M/M, Marine Corps, Music, No Smut, Panic Attacks, Past Child Abuse, Past Torture, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Prosthetics, Protective David Rossi, Rape/Non-con Elements, Ryker lives in big sweaters ok?, Therapy, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, its 3 am idk what im doing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-05-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:15:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23274586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadtimesbabey/pseuds/sadtimesbabey
Summary: Ryker Jones, a twenty-five year old who just so happens to be an old (but literally young) friend of SSA David Rossi. He's in a bit of predicament after being honorably discharged from the Marines Corps and he can't afford his own place. And due to medical conditions, being alone over three hours is not safe for his well being. So with a new office buddy, who happens to be a short, hyper-vigilant, trauma-ridden man wins his way into one Dr. Spencer Reid's heart?(starts at season 5ish so spencer is 28)
Relationships: David Rossi & Original Male Character(s), Spencer Reid/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 81





	1. Chapter 1

Ryker Jones was, for lack of a better word, screwed. He’d been honorably discharged from his position of Sargenet. According to his physc eval he was very, very unstable after watching half of his unit, and First Sergeant get tortured and killed in front of him. So, they let him go with one leg, a fuck-ton of physical and mental problems and a purple heart. He didn't have much money and he was not willing to go back anywhere near his family so he did what he had to, calling his last resort. David Rossi. Rossi had been an old friend of his sisters before she succumbed to breast cancer. He’d always supported Ryker, joining the Marines and with him quickly jumping ranks like hurdles he was beyond proud. However, Ryker wasn’t the best at telling when people were proud of him.

It was about five p.m and Ryker nervously picked up his phone and dialed Rossi.  
“SSA David Rossi”  
“Uh, hey Dave, it’s me. Ryker. Sorry it’s been a while.”  
A sigh was heard in the background and the background noise on Rossi's end quieted a bit “Jones? It’s been a little bit more than a while. It has been eight months where the hell have you been? None of my contacts could tell me anything.”  
Ryker looked at his lap “Yeah, about that. I don’t have a place and I was wondering if you could help me? It’s a bit of a long story.”  
David stayed silent for a bit. “Of Course I’ll help you, kid. Where are you?”  
“Currently i’m Pittsberg. A hampton inn.”  
“That’s maybe a five, five and a half hour drive. I’ll come pick you up.”  
“Wait, no, dave that too far you ca-.” Ryker let out a groan as Rossi hung up. He looked around the room, his two bags sat in the corner, his clothes and his medical supplies. The only clothes he had were his uniform, socks, underwear, and his bathroom stuff. Currently he was wearing his boxers and grey Corps shirt. His other bag held his leg, ointents, medicine, and the prized purple heart. He had his team's dog tags on, he’d been the only one to survive. He had managed to steal an automatic off on an enemy, killing them. He had to go on foot to the nearest base, two of his teammates were killed on that three day journey. He had barely survived. His right leg became infected, his torturers used some sort of chemical and a good amount of it got into a massive cut on his leg and after eight months of that slowly building up then the three days running the doctors said his leg had no chance. Ryker sighed and thumbed the tags, he lied down, ‘just a few minutes’ he thought. ‘I’ll be up before Dave gets here.’

David sighed and knocked on the hotel door of Ryker for the third time. He was in the middle of knocking the fourth time when he heard a heavy thump and some grunts. He was about to bust the door when a very disheveled Ryker Jones was yanking the door open, his full uniform on, it being a bit sideways and pointing a very much loaded pistol mack dap center of Rossi's forehead. David first noticed the glazed look in Rykers eyes and heavy eye bags  
“Ryker? It's me , David Rossi. Your name is Ryker Jones. You're in a Hampton Inn, room one-oh-four.” Rossie repeated that a few times, Ryker eventually uncocking the pistol and throwing it in his bag.  
“I’m so, so sorry. Come in, I’m sorry Dave.” He mumbled, ushering him in and shutting the door and locking it. “Thank you for driving out. Can I explain in the car?”  
Rossi nodded “Of course. It's five hours. Ready?”  
Rker gave a nod and grabbed his two bags, making sure nothing of his medical one could be seen. He really, really didn’t want Rossi to know. Although unbeknownst to him a very curious Penelope Garcia and behavioural Analysis Team were reading through Rykers entire marine history, nothing of his personal history, they felt that was too invasive. But when Rossi gets an urgent call from someone half his age they get a bit curious.

As soon as they hit the road Ryker let out a long sigh. “So and explanation is wanted I suppose.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a quick warning: this chapter has very very graphic depictions of violence and rape  
> so   
> beware  
> ALSO THE ITALIC IS A FLASHBACK SO YEAH

**~~previously~~**

**As soon as they hit the road Ryker let out a long sigh. “So an explanation is wanted I suppose.”**

**\---------------------------**

Rossi gave Ryker a side glance “That’d be preferable, yes.”

Ryker nodded. “Well, it all started eight months ago.”

_ “Sargent Jones, are you ready to breach? I repeat, Sargent Jones are you ready to breach.” _

_ “Yes sir, we are in position.” _

_ “Ok, go go go!” _

_ Ryker led his team into the underground tunnels that got close to the wanted before it went black. _

_ He awoke to a harsh whip to his back. Ryker let out a groan “What the fuck do you want.” He hissed out, noting his lack of shirt. _

_ “Well, Sargent Jones, I think you know what we want.”  _ _ Tivon Askari stepped into his view, chuckling as he thrashed about, trying to hit Askari.  _

_ “I’m never giving up the information. You bitch.” He growled out _

_ “Oh, well, you see, that’s quite unfortunate because I'm getting the names no matter what. And for that, fantastic back talk I think you get a gift.” _

_ Jones’ eyes widened as Askari dragged Willingham, a rookie with four kids and a wife, out. Wiligham always talked about them. “Now, you see Jones, Willingham knows nothing, and I know that so therefore, he’s no use to me.” Willingham collapsed, a bullet in his brain.  _

_ Ryker let silent tears fall as the torture went on. He got electrocuted, whipped, slashed at, punched. _

_ According to Askari it had been three weeks, and also according to Askari, due to lack of names given Ryker gets another gift. His last gift was still on the floor in front of him, rotting. This time two lance corporals were brought out, Bian and Hampton, lifelong friends and neighbors. This time however, before the shot their genitals were cut off then stuffed into their mouths. Jones never revealed the names. _

_ It had been three months. Two others were killed in front of him. The one good thing that came out of the three month was that Ryker had found out that they would be gone a whole day for unknown reasons. Right before they left they brutally raped him, he could still feel their cruel laughs as they pounded various items inside him over and over again. For the day he quickly collected his teams tags, hiding them under a grate they never looked at. When he escaped that would be the first thing he grabbed. When they returned he felt his beyond empty stomach drop, they had brought two children and his first sergeant, Lucy Miller. _

_ It had been a total of seven months, he’s had to witness the two children get raped repeatedly then murdered infront of him and he’d been forced to rape Lucy. Soon though, a month later, Ryker had saved his small bit of food and energy, while the gang was gone he got himself loose, and eventually off the chains. He did the same to Lucy along with the other Sargent, Murphy. They stood by the door, and waited for someone to come in. It was one of Askaris men. Lucy broke his neck and Ryker grabbed the gun, thanking any deity that existed when he saw the full magazine and three extras. Ryker quickly grabbed the hidden tags and ran out, shooting any enemy he saw. _

_ It had been three days of wandering and killing. Lucy died on the first day, in Ryker arms, she had been shot. Murphy died three minutes ago. He had begged Ryker to shoot him, he eventually gave in. SO now, he had a total of seven tags hanging on his neck. He had a very, very ripped shirt on and practically no pants. Ryker saw an american base and sprinted to them, dropping the gun and raising his hands “Don’t shoot, don't shoot! My name is Sergeant Ryker Jones of the United States Marines! My identification number is four-oh-seven-nine-eight-six-oh-oh-two! I need… medical attention.” It was then when he passed out. And it was then when he was saved. _

  
  


David stayed silent the entire time. As soon as Ryker had finished his tale he busted out sobbing and he quickly pulled over, comforting Ryker

“Theres- theres something. There's something you don’t know.” Ryker whispered hoarsely after about ten minutes. “I don’t have a leg. I also got a purple heart. I’ve been honorably discharged.” He let out a few more sobs “I have nowhere to stay. And I'm not allowed to be alone Due to mental instability.” He mumbled

Rossi was silent “Stay with me. When I have a case you can stay with Penelope, she’s our technical analyst.” He paused “Do you have any belonging at your old place?”

Ryker shook his head “Right now it’s at the post office waiting to see if it gets delivered to a house or to a charity. It’s just my clothes, books, CDs and player. Could I have the set to your place?” He asked hopefully, quickly texting the post office Rossi’s address when he was given confirmation. “Thank you.” 

Rossi nodded “Of course. Now we have maybe an hour left of the drive, try to get some rest.” Rossi stated as he began to drive.


	3. Chapter 3

**~~previously~~**

**Rossi nodded “Of course. Now we have maybe an hour left of the drive, try to get some rest.” Rossi stated as he began to drive.**

**\---------------------------**

Ryker didn’t end up sleeping. He was too anxious, what if the team didn't like him? What if Penelope didn’t want to look after him? While he faked sleeping he listened to Rossi’s calls, it had gone to Aaron, Derek, Spencer, Emily, JJ, and Penelope. All said about the same, Dave was bringing an old friend to the BAU who just got home, don't bombard him. 

Soon they arrived and Dave woke a ‘sleeping’ Ryker. 

“Are we here already?” He asked, feigning a sleepy voice.

Dave nodded “That we are. The team is gonna meet us in my office for introductions then we have the weekend off.”

Ryker nodded “Do you mind if I just wore my uniform, I dont have the energy to change right this second.”

Dave nodded and helped Ryker out, noting his slight limp and how when they got closer to the door he drew himself together, like nothing had happened. And that would be believable if you didn't notice the scared scrossing on his hands or how his right leg moved differently from his left. Or how any time they entered a room he quickly scanned for threats, his hands clenched until it was fully known it was safe.

Soon after about thirty minutes of security, his medication, gun, ID, and other various items had to be checked, he got a few nods when his award was spotted in his bag but he paid no attention to that. He was only paying attention to staring straight ahead, he didn’t need anyone thinking he was weak, he had to be alert.

Eventually, they were in Rossi’s office, no one was there yet, except for someone Dave called Aaron.

“My name is Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner, unit chief of the BAU.” He held out his hand and Ryker gave a fir handshake in return 

“Sergeant Ryker Jones, sir. Pleasure to meet you. Dave’s told me literally nothing about you.” Aaron gave a small smile at that. Three sets of eyes turned to the door when a group of a very eccentric busty woman, a tall man with very pronounced eyebrows, a blonde with a smile, a brunette with a matching smile, and a scrawny young looking kid with a revolver on his waist walked in. 

“I’m gonna go out on a limb and say that you're the rest of the BAU team?”

The eccentric busty woman nodded “That is in fact the truth. I’m Penelope, I do the magical tech-y stuff! You're Ryker?” Penelope gave a smile when he nodded in affirmation

“Okay, halt the introductions I’m gonna guess.” Ryker said and took a small step back, feeling crowded “You're Derek Morgan.” He said, pointing to eyebrows. “Jennifer Jareau and Emily Perentiss.” He said pointing to the blonde and brunette. “And you're Doctor Spencer Reid.” He stated pointing to the admittedly cute boy.

Derek blinked “How’d you know? Rossi said you've never met us.” He said skeptically

“Your badges.” Ryker deadpanned “And I'm Sergeant Ryker Jones. Just call me Ryker.”

They all greeted him, Spencer spoke up “Did you know seven thousand fourty three people have the name Ryker?” 

Ryker shook his head “I did not. Thank you for that fact.” He said with a smile. “Did you know no one is as cute as you?” He said with a smirk, the rest of the team chuckling slightly at Spencer’s flushed face. 

Soon the greetings were done and they started heading out “Garcia, can I see you a moment?”

She nodded and waited “I was wondering, when we have a case out of town can Ryker stay with you? He has a medical condition and it can be fatal if he is alone for too long.”

Penelope nodded “Of course. As long as he doesnt break my computers, I have an empty section he can have.” 

Rossi smiled “Thank you, oh and Garcia, even though you already know let Ryker tell you his story before you ask questions.”


	4. Chapter 4

It was Saturday morning and Ryker was unpacking his boxes. Rossi already had furniture in the guest room, which was now his, so all Ryker had to do was put decorations and other personal stuff away. He decided to start with his closet as that’d be the fastest. He put on his playlist, smiling when the first song that came on shuffle was Make Room!!! By My Chemical Romance. He started with tee-shirts. He had two sections for those, normal ones and band tees. Most of his normal shirts had fun patterns on them, he had one with succulents, and one with space stuff. His band tees featured The Beatles, Five Finger Death Punch, and The Eurythmics. The next section were his button up shirts. Most of them were loose, and when he wore them he name buttoned the top two buttons, unless it was a formal event. He always made sure to make sure his clothes had fun patterns. His high school years had taught him that. Ryker shook his head, clearing  _ those _ thoughts and focusing back into reality, quietly singing along to Shake Me by Cinderella. His next section was just sweaters and hoodies, nothing really special about them. He hung his pants up on the opposite side, consisting of mostly black ripped jeans and a couple pairs of slacks. He had one pair of shorts, white jean shorts that went to mid thigh that had a rainbow running down the side, he only wore them if he went to pride parades.

After his closet he started putting stuff away. His bathroom stuff in the bathroom, having an extra caddy for his medications and various cremes. He had a few succulents spread around his room, books stacked on many of the flat surfaces. They were mostly books about plants and animals. He had a few mugs, they were both blue, one having a blue jay on it and the other being blank. Next he hung up a few pictures. Most of them from his adulthood. He only hung one up from his childhood, one from his senior year with his then-boyfriend, obviously secret then, his name was Stephen and they dated until, well, until Ryker got deployed the first time, which was about four years ago. He was glad he didn't have any other childhood photos. He didn't want to be reminded of  _ then. _ Ryker sighed and laid on the bed, wincing when his metal leg clunked against the bed. He took the leg off, he had over-worn it anyways.

Ryker sat there in thought. He wondered how his friend Luke was doing. He also wondered if he’d be welcome at Lucy’s, Willingham’s, Bian’s, Murphy’s, and Hampton’s funerals. And as quick as the thought came he went in a downward spiral. Becoming unaware of the passing of time.

It had been about two hours since Ryker finished and David went to check on him, frowning when he saw him staring up at the ceiling with a blank face and dried tear tracks. “Ryker.” He called out softly “You okay?” 

Ryker’s head snapped to Rossi. “Yeah. Of course.” He mumbled, quickly wiping at his face “What are we doing for dinner?” 

“Well, Penelope had already scheduled a dinner with the team and their close family, we do that every so often. Wanna come?” He asked, smiling when he gave confirmation “Okay, it’s in an hour, we’re leaving in about forty-five minutes.” 

Ryker sighed and nodded, sitting up “Where is it?”

“It’s here. You don’t need to be overly fancy.” 

Ryker sighed as David walked out the room and he stood, holding onto the bed frame for balance. Hobbling over to the bathroom for a quick shower. He saw there was a seat thing in the shower and he smiled softly as he set the shower temperature at hot, he would never be in cold water.  _ Ever. _ He quickly showered, keeping his eyes up and away from the abundance of scars that covered his toned body. As he stepped out the shower he wiped the steam away from the reflection of his face.His hair that had grown out while in the hospital looked somewhat healthy, finally freed from the close cut of uniform haircuts. His brown eyes held secrets and Hell itself. His eyebags very prominent and dark. A few scars cut over his cheek, one going through his lip. He sighed and hobbled to his closet, pulling on an old and faded Queen shirt. He yanked on a pair of somewhat tight black jeans, making sure that when his leg was on it wasn't noticeable it was fake. He froze in alarm when he heard the doorbell ring, relaxing slightly when he heard the loud voice of Penelope and the surprisingly soothing voice of Hotch. He pulled his boots on struggling a bit with the plastic foot and ran a hand through his hair, walking down the staircase, one hand on the rail then other in his pocket, holding a small switchblade. 

“Ah, Ryker. I was just talking about you. I was telling Aaron and Penelope that you can’t be alone and Penelope agreed to share her office while we’re gone!” He said happily, Penelope smiling widely “I also got you something! It’s like a welcome to the team gift, kind-of.” He smiled and pulled out a book about African birds and their functions “Rossi said you liked birds and had nothing on African birds.” She shrugged 

Ryker gave her a real smile, while small, it was real “Thank you Penelope I will treasure this. I love it.” He smiled and gave her a light hug, that action honestly surprising himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so i dont think i gave ryker a fc so hes roughly based off of harry styles (at lest looks wise)  
> (https://www.google.com/search?q=harry+styles&rlz=1C1CHBF_enUS859US859&sxsrf=ALeKk013cP9YeQliHk6tHsedLGYxqGTY3Q:1585168079940&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiwp8Giu7boAhUIWq0KHXduAUIQ_AUoAnoECCQQBA&biw=1920&bih=937#imgrc=aVeHNkGTTKPiUM)
> 
> also next chapter will be dinner and ryker talking to his therapist so be ready for that :)


	5. Chapter 5

“I’m gonna go put this away. Be right back.” He said excitedly, all but running up the stairs. As soon as he put it on his bed, he was gonna read it later, he walked out of his room, freezing when he heard the loud voice of Derek Morgan. He took a deep breath and walked down the stairs again, hiding a wince when his skin pinched.

Derek watched closely, he was suspicious of Ryker. He was shifty and Garcia's background check came up with almost nothing. Soon, everyone had arrived and Ryker helped bring the food to the large enough table. Although, it seemed they were behind closed doors for a while. So Derek listened in 

“-- Almost out. I don’t know how long I can last.” Ryker said in a hushed tone

“We’ll figure it out. And if it gets too much just come to me.” He said in an equally as hushed tone. 

Derek narrowed his eyes and shifted a bit

“I know that, but what if it’s too strong. And I can't not have it?” He hissed worriedly 

“Then i’ll help you. It’s part of the recovery Ryker.” He said gently. “And recovery takes time. Now, let's bring the food out before they think the worst.” Rossi sighed, and Derek quickly rushed back to his seat

Soon, everyone was served and eating, Ryker having a much smaller amount of food than the others. Ryker stood when he finished “I’ll be right back.” He said awkwardly, and walked up to his room. 

“So Rossi, what’s Jones on?” He asked casually, the rest of the team looking at him confused.

Rossi blinked “I’m sorry what?” 

Derek sighed “What drug is he on? I heard you talking about it. Plus he shows all the symptoms of being on something.” He stated confidently.

“You eavesdropped on us?” He asked “And what makes you think it’s drugs?” He said almost protectively

“Well, his eyes are very bloodshot, he’s very overly conscious, he’s always scratching at his arm and his mind always seems to be elsewhere.” He said “You know Dave, you really should get him help.”

Rossi took a deep breath in “I’ll have you know that he has all of those for very, very personal reasons. And he is getting help but for something else. So I suggest you dont profile one of my closest friends.” He stated with a glare, that glare quickly diffusing as Ryker walk down the stairs slowly

“Welcome back to the party. Now since we’re all done lets play a game. How about Two Truths and a Lie?” He suggested clearing the table and ushering everyone to the living room area where everyone was now sitting. 

They all nodded in agreement and Emily raised her hand “I’ll go first.” She thought for a moment “Okay, I used to dye my hair blonde, I can knit, and I like to bake.” She stated confidently. Rossi, JJ, and Penelope all guessed her lie was her dyeing her hair. Derek and Aaron guessed the lie was knitting while Spencer and Ryker guessed the baking. Emily sighed “I fucking hate baking.” She said with a smile, Ryker and Spencer smiled victoriously. Penelope gasped “You used to dye your hair blonde!?” And Emily winced “Unfortunately.”

“I’m next! “ Penelope said loudly, not noticing Ryker shy away a bit from the loudness. Although a very worried genius gave him a concerned look.

“Okay, I have two cats, I used to be full-on emo, and I hate clowns.” Emily, JJ, and Rossi all said her being emo was the lie. Derek said her hatred of clowns was fake while Aaron, Ryker, and Spencer said her having two cats was a lie. “I unfortunately don’t have any pets.” He sighed sadly while Reid and Ryker cheered “Two for two!” Ryker said happily. Derek groaned “Damn it.” He mumbled “I'll go now I guess.” He thought for a moment “Alright, I’m from Chicago, I have three sisters, and I’ve only had two actual girlfriends.” He said with a smirk Emily, Penelope, JJ, Aaron and Rossi saying the girlfriend thing was a lie. While Spencer and Ryker said his statement about having three sisters was fake. Derek groaned “I only have two sisters.” Rossi snickered “I’ll go.” He paused “I’m Italian, I have one ex-wife, and I enjoy playing video games.” He shrugged. JJ, Penelope, Emily and Derek said him playing video games was fake while Spencer, Aaron and Ryker said him only having one ex-wife was false. How are you so good at this?” He asked Ryker and Spencer. Both shrugging in unison. Aaron sighed “I’ll go. I have a sister, I have a son, and I used to work in Seattle.” He said. Derek, Rossi, Penelope, Emily, and JJ said his working in Seattle was a lie while Spencer and Ryker said him having a sister was a lie.

Aaron looked to Ryker and Spencer “How are you so good at this?” He asked, slightly amazing while they looked at each other and shrugged in unison. 

Spencer bit his lip “I’ll go.” He thought for a moment. “I can read twenty thousand words a minute, I used to lecture at different colleges. And I have two PhD’s.” Derek, Rossi, JJ and Emily said that his lecturing was fake while Aaron, Penelope and Ryker said that him having two Phd’s was a lie. Spencer sighed “Ryker is now five for five. JJ, you're up.” JJ sighed “I grew up in Pennsylvania, I used to be communications liaison, and I have a brother.” She sighed when everyone said having a brother was the lie “Alright, Ryker, your turn.” She said

Ryker grinned nervously “Okay, well, I’ve known Dave since I was four, I used to want to be a zoologist, and I enjoy knitting.” He said. Dave and Aaorn said him knowing Dave since he was four was a lie, Derek saying he wanted to be a zoologist was a lie, while Spencer, JJ, Emily and Penelope said him knitting was a lie. Ryker smiled “Well, it appears I beat you cute stuff,” he said with a wink to Spencer “Because I’ve known Dave since I was born.” He said victoriously “And I guess since I’m new you each can ask me two questions, Except you Dave, you're not allowed to embarrass me.” 

Derek went first “How long did you serve and when did you learn to knit?”

“I served seven years, and a friend taught me.” He shrugged

“How old are you and where are you from?” Emily asked 

“I’m twenty-five and I grew up in Dallas, Texas.”

Aaron spoke up “Have you ever had any pets and what’s your favourite colour?”

“I used to have a dog then a snake and I like blue.”

“What's your favorite band and how did you get those scars on your hands and arms?” JJ asked curiously

Ryker cursed internally, he had forgotten he wore a short sleeved shirt. “Well my favorite band is probably Jimi Hendrix or KISS. And I’m omitting the second question.”

“What’s your favorite book and how long until you get deployed again?” Spencer asked

“I love The Witch Of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth George Speare. And Never.” He said bluntly

Spencer nodded and stood “Well, I need to get going, I have a lecture tomorrow morning. See you later and it was nice meeting you Ryker.” Ryker smiled and winked at him. 

Soon everyone had left and Ryker let out a breath. “I’m going to bed, night Dave.” He said tiredly before retiring to his room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok a few things !
> 
> 1- sorry for no update yesterday my internet gave out  
> 2- next chapter will have therapy  
> 3- thanks for kudos ! please give me some feedback and also WOW thanks for over 100 hits !!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo this is some sad ish stuff read with caustion

Ryker sighed as he walked into his therapist's office. It had been two days since the dinner and he had lots of things to talk about.

“Welcome back Ryker, thank you for coming out in this weather.” Brandi said with a soft smile, it had been raining cats and dogs since the previous night, “How have you been?”

“Well, I’ll give a small rundown in list form I guess then you tell me what to talk about.” He mumbled before settling himself on the couch, sitting cross legged and setting his plastic leg to the side. “Number one, I’ve started knitting a blanket. Number two, the dreams keep getting worse. Number three, one of Dave’s friends hates me. Number four, I have a huge fucking crush. And number six, I don’t think I’m gonna go to Willingham's, Bian’s, Hampton’s, Millers, or Murphy's funeral.” He said, scratching at his hand anxiously. Upon closer inspection small scabs were seen covering his hands, none of them touching the whip scars.

Brandi blinked “Well, let's start with the dreams, have you tried visualising them changing, or having a friend wake you?”

Ryker shook his head “No, well, I've tried the first one it’s just I can’t change history and I don’t want to do that to Dave.” He mumbled

Brandi sighed “Well, tell me about the blanket you’re knitting.”

Ryker brightened “Oh, I work on it when I can’t sleep and it’s gonna be a sunset and I’m making it for Dave.” He said happily

Brandi smiled “That’s good! Now, speaking of Dave why do you think his friend hates you?” 

Ryker slouched “He thought I was a drug addict, and he even pulled me aside and said he’s not playing games and he won’t treat me like a kid. Said I have no reason to be in the BAU even though it’s medical related and I won’t even see him.” 

She frowned “Have you told Dave about that interaction?” He shook his head “Have you told anyone?” He shook his head again. “Do you want me to tell Dave?” She asked softly. Wordlessly handing him a tissue when he nodded childishly and wiped at his eyes

“Thank you.” He whispered.

She smiled. “Of course, now tell me about not wanting to go to the funerals.” 

Ryker sighed “I feel like I don’t deserve it. I caused their deaths, if I had given the codes they wouldn’t be dead and I would have two legs. I can’t just go to the funereal and be like ‘hey sorry for your loss I’, the only one who survived and its all my fucking fault.’ Can I? Can I!” He yelled out, trying to stand, only to fall. He quickly slouched over and let heart-breaking sobs rip through his body “I just- I just, don’t deserve- don’t deserve to live. After- after what I- I cause.” He said brokenly, crying.

Brandi sat there, knowing that touch wouldn’t be a good thing at the moment. She sighed when there were ten minutes left “Ryker?” She asked quietly “I’m gonna go get Dave so I can bring him back here and tell him about his friend, I’m gonna leave the door open.” She said and quickly hurried to get Dave from the waiting area.

They quickly hurried back, Ryker in the corner of the couch and staring into space, hot tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Dave, I have some unsettling news.” Brandi said softly “Also, let Ryker dissociate for now, he needs it. Anyways, Ryker told me that one of your co-workers accused him of using drugs, then after the dinner pulled him aside and proceeded to threaten him and belittled his medical needs.” She said solemnly

Dave through for a moment “Morgan.” He said firmly “He asked me what drug Ryker was using. I’ll have a very strict talk to him.” He said sternly.

“Also, I do believe that you need to encourage Ryker to speak up about his own feelings and maybe give him a bit of affection.” She said

Dave nodded and slowly helped Ryker put his leg back on, leading him out slowly, Ryker still out of it. “Thank you Brandi, see you next week.” He said, helping Ryker into the car then driving off.

\----------------------------------

Soon when they had arrived Ryker was still a bit out of it but more present than before, able to respond. As soon as they had gotten in the house Ryker ran up to his room, closing the door and collapsing in his bed. He grabbed his old stuffed eeyore and fell into a surprisingly deep sleep, unknowingly chewing on the ear of Eeyore.

\-----------------------------------

He watched as Dave and Ryker slowly walked in, Ryker obviously high. He had to do something. He couldn’t have Dave be in this sort of trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG WAS DEALING WITH SOME STUFF BUT IM BACK ALSO SORRY FOR THE HATE ON DEREK ITS FOR THE PLOT (kinda)


	7. quick not

hey guys its emerson.  
ive been having some writers block and i also broke my toe.  
next chapter will be up maybe tomorrow or day after.  
i will delete this when it gets uploaded :) thanks for understanding


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